Since living in Dar-es-Salaam, the concept of fake people and fake friendships has become something that I have noticed that has become more pronounced in this town. I don’t care if readers think I am generalising here – I am just talking from my experience but Dar from what I have seen for the 2+ years I have been back is full of people who are afraid to hear the truth. Who are friends if they don’t check you on your bullshit? Who are friends if they don’t watch out for you?
#1 Real friends call you on your shit, fake friends build you up on your bullshit
One of my closest friends will always tell me when she thinks I am overreacting even when I am like nooooo you need to agree. That’s a real friend, she doesn’t want me to look crazy or weird if I am truly overreacting and she always keeps it to me real. I thank her for that because there have been situations where I have been wrong and I check with her and she lets me know.
#2 Real friends stand up for you, fake friends leave when times get hard
A true friend will stand up for you when times are hard. Fake friends want to be with you when the money is flowing and times are good. I wish people in Dar-es-Salaam would see that fake friendships are everywhere in this town and real friends are few and far in between.
#3 Real friends don’t like everything you do and don’t suck up to you, fake friends think everything you do is gold
Hey none of us are perfect! We can’t always do everything perfectly and sometimes we get things wrong. A real friend will not suck up to you for everything that you do but someone who is there for the ride is definitely a yes-man or yes-woman.
Ultimately friendships are like whisky – the young fresh friendships look trendier just like the younger whiskies but the older whiskies have the staying power. Never forget your old friends – they might be the ones who won’t be fake like your new mates.